The Desperate Girl
Then: Single female law student urgently seeking a boyfriend.
Now: Just celebrated her five-year anniversary on match.com. No longer requires potential suitors to have hair. Works for the public defender and is always sure to ask her clients if "there's a Mrs. Accused of Attempted Robbery".
The Old Guy
Then: Old Guy in the school. Loved the sound of his own voice.
Now: Whereabouts unknown; presumed dead or fly fishing.
The Philosopher
Then: Unbearable intellectual classmate
Now: Landed a good job but no longer is able to entertain his musings. His new philosophy is "I bill therefore, I am". Desperately wants to get into teaching but is bound to the profession by the golden handcuffs. Rationalizes it by rereading Ayn Rand.
The Hot Girl
Then: Inexplicably hot girl in law school
Now: Got married and left her job to have a kid. Says she's going to go back in a few years, but we all know she won't. One of the 12 people who never misses an episode of The Good Wife.
Jean Shorts Guy
Then: Fashion-challenged weird guy in your class
Now: Low level government attorney; As predicted, wears short sleeve dress shirt with a tie. Still rocks the jorts on weekends. Loved Avatar.
The Feminist
Then: Shrill empowered girl in your class
Now: Single but looking. Spends her days works in public interest. Spends her nights masturbating to Don Draper and then has herself a good cry.
The Frat Boy
Then: Partying bro in your class
Now: Big firm grunt, loves to get wasted on the weekends. Still single, and doesn't see any problem with that. Will soon turn into the old guy at the club.
The Canary
Then: The person you always looked at to reassure yourself that you're not the worst student
Now: Never found a job. Burdened by debt. All to warn you that someone is in a worse spot than you are.
Agent Mulder
Then: Class conspiracy theorist
Now: After getting denied by the FBI, became an IRS auditor. Able to see malfeasance even when there is no malfeasance. Gets very angry if he comes across Lost spoilers.
Federline
Then: The lazy boyfriend/fiance/husband of your female classmate
Now: Got dumped after the sexual/income imbalance became too prominent. Closely following the current situation with John Edwards. Still in a band.
Hypo Man
Then: Extremely annoying classmate who asked ridiculous hypothetical questions
Now: Avid Tea Party member
The Ex-Cop
Then: Cop who thought he could better himself by going to law school
Now: In the criminal justice system the people are represented by two separate but equally important groups, the cops who retire on giant pensions and the ex cops who pay student loans from their meager prosecutor salaries. Bum Bum. Still an asshole.
Lucy
Then: Strong willed ass kicking female classmate
Now: Busting her way through the law profession with gusto and smeared makeup. On Saturdays she dresses like an expensive prostitute (with sexy results).
Red
Then: Person who knows everything about everyone in the law school
Now: Law librarian.
High School Smoker
Then: Pretending to hate law school so as not to be shunned
Now: Dutifully pretending that she doesn't mind working as a paralegal, despite her JD.
Captain Law School
Then: Your school's Mr. Everything
Now: Thought that volunteering for the Obama campaign would turn into a real job, but not so much. Now Captain Document Review.
The BFFs
Then: Female classmates joined at the hip from day one
Now: One got a job, the other didn't. They are no longer friends but stalk each other on Facebook. Still thinks that she is more attractive than her BFF.
