Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Procrastination

There are many ways to procrastinate: Snood, Drinking Alone, “Treating yourself” to Arrested Developments 1st season on DVD. There is, however, one way that becomes more and more compelling as exams wear on: Imagining scenarios of your future life where you are not a lawyer.

Here’s my day went while studying.

9:15 AM: It’s May and it’s still cold outside. I wonder what the temperature is in Maui?

10:00 AM: I wonder if there are any law jobs in Maui? There must be. There’s been like 5 hour long dramas about private eyes in Hawaii.

11:00 AM: I’ve just spent the past hour imagining myself as Magnum P.I. Oh no. I just looked at Maui house prices. How am I going to afford that?

1:00 PM: Maui! What was I thinking? Mexico! That’s where it’s at. All of the sunshine and none of the cost.

1:30 PM: Wait a minute. I don’t speak Spanish. Well if I learned what “res ipsa loquitor” means how hard could “Donde esta la bano” be?

2:30 PM: Uh oh. I’ve just spent an hour going over the Spanish conjugation I learned in high school. Think positive! I’ve just invested an hour in learning my future language. After all, there'll be no need for the law down Mexico way. It’ll be good to be rid of all the pretension up here, or as they say down there, “We don’t need no stinking badges.”

2:45 PM: Trip to Taco Bell. I roll my “R” when ordering a Nacho Grrrande.

3:30 PM: Check my fantasy baseball league. I’m offered a trade: I give up Rafael Furcal in exchange for Sean Casey and Brett Myers. I better do some extensive research here.

4:15 PM: I now know that Sean Casey has hit .600 this season with runners in scoring position and two outs. Brett Myers has a strikeout-to-walk ratio of 34/9. Furcal is just sitting on my bench. I’m going to accept this trade.

4:45 PM: I wonder if I could be the GM of a baseball team. I should read Moneyball again.

5:00 PM: Time for a study break

5:03 PM: I just saw a commercial for the new Brownie Batter Blizzard from Dairy Queen.

5:04 PM: I’m on my way to Dairy Queen.

5:30 PM: That was a damn good Blizzard. Back to work.

5:55 PM: Why is Jimmy Fallon popular?

6:00 PM: That Blizzard is making me sleepy. I better go lie down on the couch.

9:00 PM: Wake up just in time to watch all the shows I TiVo’d that day.