Monday, April 04, 2005

A Very, Very Special Episode of 'Saved by the Bell'

It is Homecoming Week, and in addition to all the buzz that usually surrounds Homecoming at Bayside High, the big game is against arch-rival Valley High. Being the incorrigible scamp that he is, Zach places a $1,000 bet on the game with a local bookie he meets at The Max. With the game two days away, Bayside holds a pep rally for the team, followed by a party at Lisa's house. The party is going great, except Screech can't find his girlfriend Violet. Being the loyal friend that he is, Zach volunteers to help Screech find her. He goes upstairs and hears a faint, nerdy, female voice.

"Stop. No. Please stop. Please stop," the voice sobs from a behind a closed door.

Zach rushes in to find Slater holding Violet down on the bed, her dress torn and her horn-rimmed glasses broken. Startled, Slater lets her go, and Violet rushes out of the room. Zach is flabbergasted, and Slater pleads with Zach.

"Look Preppie, you better not tell anyone about this. If you do, I'll be suspended and won't play in the game Saturday. You got to promise you won't tell."

Zach, still shellshocked, promises Slater not to tell. But when he returns downstairs, he sees Screech, who is upset, and wonders why Viollet just ran out the back door. Zach says he doesn't know, but immediately feels guilty about it.

The next day, Bayside is shocked to learn that some girl has accused star quarterback AC Slater of sexual assault. Whats more, this girl is a nerd! Slater denies the charges, and says that Zach was with him the entire night. Mr. Belding calls Zach into his office and asks if it is true, that he was with Slater the whole time. Zach is gripped by the ultimate moral dilemma. He knows what Slater did was wrong, and the girl was his best friends' girlfriend. On the other hand, if he tells on Slater, Slater will be suspended, lose his football scholarship to Stansbury, and Bayside will lose the big game. And without Slater, Zach will surely lose his $1,000 bet.

What does Zach due? He grudgingly tells Mr. Belding that Slater was with him, that the charges are false. However, Zach is gripped with guilt, and decides to leave school for the day. On his way out, he passes Screech and Violet, and Screech gives him a knowing look. This futher sends Zach down a spiral of guilt and self-loathing. What does he do? He empties his mother's liquor cabinet and drowns out his feelings.

Fast forward to Saturday, and the big game. Nobody has seen Zach, and they are worried, because he is the Homecoming King and they can't start the parade without him. Eventually he shows, minutes before gametime, to accept his crown. Zach doesn't look good. His eyes are bloodshot and he is slurring his speech. When announced as king, Zach takes the microphone and slurs something into it. Then he looks up, and sees Screech. He looks to his right, and sees Slater. Finally, he sees Violet in the crowd, with the shattered look of innocence lost. Zach loses it.

"I lied", he bellows into the mic. "Slater did it. He assaulted that girl." Zach breaks down in tears.

The crowd lets out a gasp, and it is pandemonium. Police cuff Slater and take him away. Screech lunges towards Zach, but is held back by his fellow nerds. Jesse screams at Slater, "I always knew you were a misogynistic pig." Kelly is at the same time both proud of and disgusted with Zach. Lisa checks her makeup.

The show ends by teaching the viewers a real life lesson. Sometimes there is no happy ending. Sometimes any decision you make will turn out badly. And finally, sometimes you are not saved by the bell.